Gustafer Yellowgold


Gustafer Is Off The Grid!


Did you know that Gustafer’s house has no outside power source?

How does he do it? Well, it’s simple, really…

Gustafer Yellowgold traveled to planet Earth in a vehicle called a Sunpod. The Sunpod was a comet-like machine made up of a crust of solar elements that included stones and rocks from foot of the Solarian mountain range, bonded together with ultra-ionized raisin pate’. The day that Gustafer splashed down into Leech Lake in Minnesota, his Sunpod was smashed to bits from the impact. Gustafer and his new pal, Forrest Applecrumbie the well-dressed Pterodactyl set to work to retrieve all the broken pieces. Once gathered, they were ground into a powdery sand before they were molded into the golden bricks that make up the walls of Gustafer’s current Minnesota woodland chalet. The bricks themselves now contain an as-of-yet undiminished charge of solar energy the likes of which has never been discovered by “regular” Earth people.

Each block contains enough energy to power a major metropolis and it’s surrounding suburbs for 523 years. And the power is totally “clean” since the source is actual rubble from the Sun itself!

Should we tell anybody?

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Forrest Applecrumbie Talks Socks!

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Ga-hoo! I was tickled to bits when they asked ME to comment on this topic. Ah… The Infinity Sock. Certainly an intriguing piece of clothing. One that runs through many people’s wardrobes, but sadly can never be worn! Kudos to sir Gustafer for finding the end of that one. Some people have all the luck. Anyhow, the Infinity Sock itself, it turns out, is not made of any “mystical or celestial” type of fibers whatsoever, as one might assume. The sock seems to be a mid-quality athletic grade of organic cotton/wool blended fibers.  The stripes appear to be a muted version of the Miami Dolphins’ team colors, orange and turquoise. The toe end has a delightful hand-finished whip stitch that adds a perfectly rustic feel to this one-of-a-kind specimen of hosiery. If anyone should ever attempt to wash this sock, I would dare to recommend hand washing in a cool ocean, and then air-drying. But who has an Infinity Clothesline and that many clothespins? Ha! Not me.

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